Monday, June 30, 2008

sick and tired.

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
~~Are you stuck inside a world you hate?~~
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
~~No one ever stabbed you in the back~~
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like, what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)
To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life

APPLES!
9:54 AM

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

overwork

i never thought it would be this hard.
i should've prepared myself mentally for this.
school i mean.
for the past few days i have been having an average of 3 hrs of sleep. only.
wednesday blues. i have been hating wednesdays since the start of the year.
the workload never seems to stop.
im deprived of sleep and studying time.
eyebags are not something new.
and pimple outbreaks drive me nuts.
take note, its only the 3rd day of school.
awesome.

and the only sole reason im here is because my brain's quite jammed now.
i couldnt think properly throughout the whole day.
i couldnt even concentrate fully and stay awake.
(proof that i was half awake: my amath worksheet. full of really weird, illegible scribblings)
its extremely rare that i just give up doing my hmwk just like that.
im on the verge of a breakdown now. ):
but i like blogging.
i think its a nice form of escape.
though sometimes its like talking to yourself.

on a very much lighter note, we end an hour earlier now on thurs. which is at 2.15! hooray to the world!
but i have csp till six so it doesnt make much of a diff though.
speaking of which, i feel so burdened now.
i dont have the confidence in coping with so many subjs.
but thanks friends and teachers who have supported me all the way.
i know its too late to back out now and change my mind.
and that scares me alot.

so anw. you should check this out too:
http://sweetdaze.blogspot.com
beyond awesome. im really fascinated and inspired (agn)

i hope tmr's a better day.
i hope i can pull through tomorrow.
"we're all in this tgt"
yes i can do it (:

xoxo
hanisah

(thanks, for the strength, for the motivation.)

APPLES!
8:16 AM

Friday, June 20, 2008

cupcakes&cakes

i know many people dont really understand why some ppl really adore cupcakes and cakes (just like i do)
but i swear after seeing this, im very sure i can make ppl change their minds
http://www.flickr.com/photos/65668398@N00/
i've labelled her my most fav best cupcake maker in the whole wide world :D
she's amazing.
yes, me and liy have some wacky plans in being just like her after our o's and totally conquer Singapore's food industry! YEAH BABY!

-
okay so friends, i've realised that i've found my dream (for a part time job at least)
im gonna be a cupcake/cake maker! WHOOOOO.
i've never felt so inspired but i really wanna be as good as her.
maybe even better :D

OH. and have i told you how much im in love with Brandon Boyd!
hehehe he's so omg charming.
he's like the first male artiste that im really really crazy over and me being crazy over an artiste is like, WOW.

ohwell. im rambling again.
but i feel highhhhhhh tonight baby :D

APPLES!
9:20 AM

i know it's kinda late but...here's my tag replies (:

HEH. (i know i've only replied some tags)

aqilah: my bubbles can fly too just like siti's you know! :D and you ah, owe me outing soon ): AND YEAH. the predictions are kinda freaky, im actually waiting for July! LOL (ahemahem)

siti: HAHA bet you still cant solve but nvm. we'll concentrate on proper maths problems from on yeah. :P and yesss i somehow cant wait for school to reopen. cause then my life will be more interesting with all you retarded lovelies ((: sitting at home doing work all day is such a choreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

liy: haha okay! and you also, dah lah, told you alr its a hardddd math problem! lol. and thats not my emo blog. haha okay sort of. its just a rantinggggggg blog :D

amira: yeahh i was quite skeptical when i saw that but ah wells. only time will tell. and ah, im not talking about being aimless in life, just being aimless when we really dont know where to go (: cause surprisingly life's more interesting that way.

okay done. cikgu's driving us mad with all the karangans she gave us. ELEVEN okay. prelims coming real fast, never thought i'll ever be there. really. cause in my eyes (and maybe mind too), the sec1s are well, sec1s. the sec2s are also sec1s. the sec3s are still sec2s. and we are still sec3s (: just like as though our o's are pushed forward a year faster or smth. ah wells. i ramble alot when i overwork. see you people on monday! :D

i wanna be there for you when you need me,
be there for you when you need my help,
always.
for once i feel needed,
thanks for making me feel that way.

APPLES!
8:05 AM

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

cause you're my strength, believe it baby.

cause you're my strength. says:
when sch reopens you must pushh me to the maxxxxxxxxxx okay!!
Fireflight says:
haha okay we push each other!!! (into the canal?)
cause you're my strength. says:
LOLL i prefer into the school pond
Fireflight says:
HAHAHA OKAY SET

jsyk, you've made my day. (:

so Donut Day 1st anniversary was...(noone wished each other Happy Donut Day, mind you. we were too busy getting pissed/annoyed/upset at the whole fuzzywuzzy situation)
"my day's so fuzzywuzzy im so dizzy" (it surprisingly rhymes!)
the only good thing was during the angklung symposium.
cause our jnrs were all good and i saw my pri2 best friend. hanna, rab and aisyah made my day better.
"aisyah looks so hot!!!!" -quoted from Siti during crezawards.
WHOOOOO. im not gay. LOL.
i like her hair very very much but its sad that im too girly for that kind of hair. ):

the third worst thing was that the bus me and dian wanted to take were all so full we only managed to squeeze into the 1st...2nd...3rd...4th...5th...6th...7th...8th...9th...! into the 9th bus. after waiting for a full goddamnit 55 mins! FIFTY-FIVE MINUTES!!

sidetrack a bit. but rgs girls are all so different.
the super goddamnit bitch sitting beside me during the symposium thing was so freaking annoying. i swear i can go on pages ranting about her. (no not hanna! some unknown irritating rg girl)
but the one in the bus is super nice i tell you. (:

anw. second worst thing. well yeah. cocked-up plan and everyone got upset/pissed/annoyed for some reason or another. i tell you, anth we plan in advance never works. so the other 3 of you, lets join me, raihan and aqilah in being the aimless soulzxzx. (: that way, nothing gets fucked up and we can all be happy carefree ppl :D

the worst thing. one of my teeth is growing 45 degrees slanted and i never realised it was this bad till yest night. you see, the problem here is that its growing slowly now and causes the tooth beside it to get uprooted and causes bleeding. which means i have to remove one of my teeth because even if i do get braces its not gonna help in any way. and i DONT WANT to have that part remain toothless for the rest of my whole entire life.
horrible. cause how can i replace that tooth? freak. i'll look horrible and ugly for the rest of my life. great.

i hate hmwk as much as everyone else does.
i have 16 essays to do and i have only done 5.

cause you're my strength. says:
haha chill we're all in this tgt!
cause you're my strength. says:
((:
the finger; makes the picture that much SEXIER (POINTS THERE!) (: says:
WE CAN!
the finger; makes the picture that much SEXIER (POINTS THERE!) (: says:
PEEE TOGETHER!
the finger; makes the picture that much SEXIER (POINTS THERE!) (: says:
HAHA! oka no. cannot!

loll she made my day too! ((:

okay. im off to try and complete the ridiculous amount of essays we have to do. (mind you, its only essays. so imagine the other workload that we have)

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
8:11 AM

Friday, June 13, 2008

friday the 13th

GAWD. i sound so emo in my previous post haha it was not meant to be emo. more like dreamy and happy and stuff. lol
friday the 13th and its such a neutral day (besides the fact tt i cant go for ge1 class outing. but wtv). probably one of the most productive days. did alot of hmwk. (and youtube-ing). everyone complains bout their holidays. but hey, me and raihan (hehe my all time partner! LOVE YOU!) have been coming back to sch for THREE effing weeks. dont know whether i can say tt it's ridiculous. besides the huge pile of hmwk, i've yet to start mugging. yeah shoot me. just from cikgu k, i alr have 10 essays to do. imagine.

ok enough crap. check this out! its from my aunt.

"Mr Juseleeno, born in 1960(reportedly still alive in 2008), is a Brazilian who has made many predictions, and MOST have come to pass, including Princess Diana's death by car accident (which is instigated by someone near her and will probably unfortunately be written off as a car accident), 911 and the 2004 Indonesian tsunami. He sees the future in his dreams, and has an average of 3 to 9 such predictions per day. When he wakes up, he will write them down, and send warnings to those concerned. If it concerns only a normal individual, he will write a letter to warn him/her. If its a famous person (celebrity, politician etc.) or matters concerning the public, he will not only send it to the individual himself/herself, but also related agencies, government and media. He urged the media to publicise these predictions but they reply always went along the lines of rejection for fear of arousing public panic.

Future predictions:

2008, July: There will be an earthquake in Japan which will cause a tsunami of 30 plus metres high to occur as well.

2008, 18th September: An earthquake with magnitude of approximately 9.1 will rock China, simultaneously causing a tsunami of more than 30 metres to occur, resulting in the deaths of more than 1 million people. Although this huge earthquake will happen after the Olympics have ended, there will be a series of relatively smaller earthquakes occuring in China before the huge earthquake. The China government, which is more concerned with the success of the Olympics, will most likely neglect to employ appropriate cautionary measures, thus the high casualty rate. If the China government does not publicise the occurence of these minor earthquakes and evacuate people, the number of deaths will be as predicted.

2008, 17th December: terrorist attack in America

2010: The temperatures in some countries of Africa could be as high as 58 degrees Celsius and there will be a serious shortage of water.

2010, 15th June: The New York Stock Exchange market will fail, causing an international financial crisis.

2011: The research on the treatment of some cancers will be completed, but a new life-threatening virus will appear. People who are infected will die approx. 4 hours of coming into contact with the virus.

2013, 1st-25th November: Research on treatment of cancers, except for brain tumors, will be completed. An earthquake, caused by volcanic eruptions, will happen on Bahama Island of the Canary Islands. A gigantic tsunami of roughly 150 metres will result. America mainlands, Brazil etc., will be affected, with the tsunami pushing into the land as far as 15 to 20 kilometres. Before the occurance of this great gigantic tsunami, the sea/ocean water levels will sink by about 6 metres and large flocks of birds will start to migrate.

2014: A small planet that has been gradually closing in on Earth might eventually collide with Earth and this collision, if come to pass, will affect the survival of humans as a whole.

2015: By the mid of November, the average temperature of Earth could be as high as 59 degrees Celsius. Many people will die from overheat, and international confusion and terror ensues.

2016, April: A huge typhoon will invade China, causing massive damage. The 43rd USA president, George Walker Bush, will enter the hospital, and faces a life or death situation.

2026, July: A super earthquake will occur in Sans Francisco, and it will be named "The Big One". Huge damage to surrounding areas. Many volcanoes will re-activate, and the height of resulting tsunami will be more than 150 metres.

Mr Juseleeno made known his predictions in hopes that people will take heed of his warnings so that these disasters may be avoided. He hopes there will be a major change in the thinking of people's mindsets in the time period 2007-2008. One factor will be the environmental issue of global warming, which is more serious than what some meteorologists assume."

i have alot to comment but i guess this post's long enough. ahwells. i'll be away during the weekends ):
17th/18th!! :D

APPLES!
6:30 AM

Thursday, June 12, 2008

lost dreams

filled with regrets. this feels so empty.
i swear i'd take every chance if only i can.
76 more and im still counting, still hoping.
i talk in circles. doubt anyone can understand anyway.

http://itsmyescapade.blogspot.com/

like they say, the only place you can run to when you have noone else to run to, is to your own world.

i've nvr felt this way, nvr thought i will, but i did.
to just burst into tears because you miss too many things, too many people.

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
9:23 AM

Saturday, June 07, 2008

mess.

a.)having the worst case of rashes ever.
b.)studying for retest &driving me insane
c.)lost all phone contacts
d.)will only have one week of sch break
e.)IM GOING VEGETARIAN FOR THE NEXT MONTH! :D/D: or more like ~~try to~~must avoid seafood, meat &oily stuff. makes no difference than being a vegetarian right? no its nth to do with my rashes (i have to visit the doctor agn for this)

pull me in so deep

i admit life's currently in a mess but i'll fix it soon so tt i can start a new term well. 天下无难事，只怕有心人！
我要逃避（？）

APPLES!
8:47 AM

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

let it out

6n(-e)
ie(++)
math is becoming more interesting now. no kidding.
go decipher.

waited but you never came.

APPLES!
7:26 AM

Monday, June 02, 2008

dengarlah.

ok. pbmc was great. alhamdulillah everything went perfectly fine and i got worried for nth.
me, hanna and raihan got so high preparing the things tt rab thinks we're mad cause we kept on laughing and laughing for no apparent reason.
somehow took over hanna's role of taking pics. so yeah i took pics so it means i was at every station and GIGGLES it was funny!
everyone had break while the sec4s helped us out to clean the mess *AWWWW*! but it was a great bonding time uhuh (:
feels kinda sad to leave because i love my JK many many many :D
and i would sincerely like to thank all PBMC members out there who came for it. for cooperating and being very supportive, making it an awesome awesome farewell ((:

so its kinda obvious tt im procrastinating now. i still have no freaking idea how to go abt doing the testimonial when the whole world has handed it in. (besides amira heh) GRAH.

i realize i dont talk much abt myself here which is sad cause its my blog after all.

ok. firstly i'd like to talk bout my music taste since i doubt even my close friends know. yes i love FSF and Secondhand Serenade very much because i think they make awesome music. (FSF is NOT a christian band btw. i still dont think tt they should be classified under 'emo' though. but they're alr non-existent now which is sad. cause they're probably my only favourite rock band ever. but but their first lead singer, Chris Carrabba is now the lead singer of Dashboard Confessional :D) but maybe my taste may be slightly different from other teens around my age now. because i really really like other great singers too. like Mariah Carey, Toni Braxton, Celine Dion & Whitney Houston. (though they are well, so called 'old') oh. Leona Lewis has been added to the list recently cause she's just as amazing as them. my all-time fav songs are still their songs btw. (My All, Unbreak My Heart, I Surrender & I Will Always Love You respectively.)
I KNOW. DAMN OLD SONGS. but the songs playing on radio these days somehow could never leave the same impact as the older songs. uhuh.

contrary to popular belief, im nowhere near a bimbo and that can be justified! i bring compact powder/concealer/lip balm to sch ONLY because well the compact powder is just nice for my skin tone. what you cant expect me to use those white baby powder right. i'll look like a ghost no kidding :0 oh yeah. my compact powder has mirror too (: plus. the concealer has been proven useful for those around me ok! to cover up big obvious pimples. sheesh. and lip balm, Singapore's weather has been so hot lately of course our lips get dry easily! perfume is a must cause agn, Singapore's nastily warm weather causes us to perspire alot and stink!
i check my uniform alot in the mirror because its so obvious my uniform is super messy (unlike my friends!) and i have to make sure its neat all the time yknow? (of course i've nvr been caught for my uniform (: )and duh. everyone knows i have messy hair no matter what i do with it. so obviously a comb is a must (actually for many boys and girls out there too okay)
okay. i think tt's enough.

and im procrastinating too much. grahgrahhgrahhh!
ok i shall go do my work now. i'll be back with Part 2 yo!!

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
7:16 AM

Sunday, June 01, 2008

apologies

im sorry im doing this for my own sake and not for your welfare.
but you're v special to me, in case you dont know that.
not even the stars or the moon can take your place and i mean it.
and jsyk, ilyvm.

xoxo
hanisah

APPLES!
9:43 AM

welcome

Church;

Dear Angel;

her.

what she wants.

what she loves.

things we wanna do after O's.

tagboard

exits

links

archives

thankyous